Saturday, May 29, 2010

RGR020 - An Offering

After a relatively short hike, we reached the village of Tempe, nestled in a little mountain alcove. The people there have a serious problem in the form of a monster of some sort who demands regular offerings of the village's young women. I don't know if the monster eats the women or what, but you can safely assume whatever it does with them isn't good. Next up on the chopping block (so to speak) is Nina, the village chief's daughter. It's a real shame, too, since she was supposed to be getting married soon.

Of course, given my propensity to destroy every monster I see, it's only natural that I'd volunteer to put an end to this one. No one else in the village seems to be brave enough to challenge the monster, so it's up to us to stop this horrible cycle of sacrifice and return safety and peace of mind to the young women of Tempe.

Besides, the monster's blocking our passage north.

This must be the place.
This must be the place.
Assuming she'd have been born somewhere else.
Assuming she'd have been born somewhere else.

I think the sacrifice part is worse.
I think the sacrifice part is worse.
Uh, I guess so.
Uh, I guess so.

Oh look, a test of strength!
Oh look, a test of strength!
Just keep walking...
Just keep walking...

I'll bet he won't help us fight the monsters.
I'll bet he won't help us
fight the monsters.
Sounds awfully pervy to me.
Sounds awfully pervy to me.


Don't worry, we've got your back.
Don't worry, we've got your back.
Or let the girl beat up the monsters.  Wuss.
Or let the girl beat up the monsters. Wuss.

According to the village shaman, the monster only appears once a girl has been given as an offering, so it looks like we won't quite be able to brute force our way through this. Instead, we'll simply become the next offering. The litter the people use for offerings looks pretty small, but we ought to be able to squeeze in if we pretend it's a clown car. Then, once the monster shows its face, we'll break said face.

Nice segue.
Nice segue.
You guys have this all figured out, I see.
You guys have this all figured out, I see.

Who the what now?
Who the what now?
I don't think we're all going to fit...
I don't think we're all going to fit...

We haven't done anything yet.
We haven't done anything yet.
Rim shot?
Rim shot?

Easier said than done, I suppose. The monster, a Chameleon Humanoid, showed up with two Rabidhounds in tow. He looked an awful lot like Saro's Shadow, but I'm chalking that up to ROM capacity limitations rather than foreshadowing. Also, maybe a little laziness on Akira Toriyama's part.

Anyway, the battle itself was pretty tough; no one seemed to have any sort of special attacks (though the Chameleon Humanoid was able to do some healing), but they were strong. Luckily, we've got a healer on our side too, so we were able to hold out long enough to finish off the Rabidhounds, and then concentrate everything we had on our main target for the win.

The news of our victory (which, I'm sure, everyone could have seen from where they all were standing) spread quickly, and the whole town was ecstatic. Everybody was celebrating, and even the item shop owner got into the spirit by reopening the item shop. After a quick weapon upgrade (Boomerangs for everyone!), we triumphantly marched north, into the mountain valley that would lead us to the next town, Frenor.

I missed the opportunity to get a screenshot of the monsters, but if you really want to know what they look like, there are plenty of images out there.

Oh no, he brought doggies!
Oh no, he brought doggies!
Oops, you blinked.
Oops, you blinked.

The village is 50 feet away.
The village is 50 feet away.
Actually, he's a pile of little chunks now.
Actually, he's a pile of little chunks now.

I kinda figured.
I kinda figured.
You guys probably could've taken him.
You guys probably could've taken him.

Yes, this statement is now correct.
Yes, this statement is now correct.
I could get used to this hero stuff.
I could get used to this hero stuff.

All right, but if I see any Wookiees, I'm gone.
All right, but if I see
any Wookiees, I'm gone.
Business as usual, eh?
Business as usual, eh?


Do they have a monster for me to kill too?
Do they have a monster
for me to kill too?
Onward to Frenor!
Onward to Frenor!


You know, we should have asked the Chameleon Humanoid what he was doing with the girls before we killed him.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

RGR020 - The Next Adventure

I've always dreamed of being a princess.
I've always dreamed of being a princess.
Kind of a weak introduction, isn't it?
Kind of a weak introduction, isn't it?

Yep, I'm bad at keeping up with gaming. That modern game I mentioned? Beat it, immediately started the sequel. But now the sequel's beaten, so maybe I'll be able to focus better on Dragon Warrior IV. I know it's wishful thinking at this point, but the pace I keep is my own, so if I want to speed up, I'll speed up. If I can manage to actually make some posts, that is.

Anyway, back to the game. Chapter 2 follows the adventure of Princess Alena, a tomboy princess from the kingdom of Santeem. She wants nothing more than to venture out into the world and prove her strength, but the king won't allow her to leave the castle. He's just concerned for her safety, since there are all kinds of scary monsters lurking outside, but that's exactly why she wants to go. Everyone around her, including her tutor, Brey, and servant Cristo, keep urging her to give up on her dream and stay in the safety of the castle.

Of course, it wouldn't be much of an adventure if she listened to everyone and stayed put. Fortunately, she recently kicked a gaping hole in the wall of her room, which is now under repair. Since the wall repair guy only seems to know how to use wood and nails, all he can manage is to cover the hole. So, with one good hard kick, Alena is able to sneak her way out of the castle.

Yeah, like you'll be able to keep me here.
Yeah, like you'll be able to keep me here.
He's not sexist, just overprotective.
He's not sexist, just overprotective.

Yeah, yeah... but I'm still leaving.
Yeah, yeah... but I'm still leaving.
Fair enough; it's all your fault!
Fair enough; it's all your fault!

You do know I live here, right?
You do know I live here, right?
Is this your first day here?
Is this your first day here?

It's my wall. I'll do what I want with it.
It's my wall. I'll do what I want with it.
You're wasting your time.
You're wasting your time.

Eww... I'll bet he's drooling a little.
Eww... I'll bet he's drooling a little.
I'm not so sure.
I'm not so sure.

Let's go protest against discrimination!
Let's go protest against discrimination!
It'll be ready when you COOK IT YOURSELF.
It'll be ready when you COOK IT YOURSELF.

At least this guy recognizes me.
At least this guy recognizes me.
And she'll promptly break those hands.
And she'll promptly break those hands.

Hey now... looks like someone has a crush...
Hey now... looks like someone
has a crush...
Oh, but you know it will.
Oh, but you know it will.


Flimsy walls are no match for me!
Flimsy walls are no match for me!
Hello there, roof kitty!
Hello there, roof kitty!

Sneak might not be the most appropriate word, since Brey and Cristo quickly catch up with Alena outside, and, realizing they can't stop her, decide instead to join her. From this point on, the king finally understands that this journey is very important to her, so he allows her to freely leave the castle as she wishes.

At this point, I spent some time fighting the weak monsters around the castle in order to gain experience and gold for weapon and armor upgrades. You know, like I always do. The nearby village of Surene has a fair selection of beginner's equipment, including things for Brey (a wizard), and Cristo (a cleric). We met a wandering poet named Marone there who kept coming up with these lame lyrics involving whatever he happened to be looking at.

We stuck around until nightfall, but there wasn't much of importance going on. Most people were sleeping and Marone was singing about things he saw in the sky, so we decided to turn in for the night. When we began to explore the area the next morning, we happened upon a sign that pointed us eastward, toward a village called Tempe. There's nothing but shoreline and mountains in every other direction, so we'll be heading east.

That's more like it!
That's more like it!
Well, that's a good start.
Well, that's a good start.

So this is what the outside world looks like...
So this is what the outside
world looks like...
Remind me not to tell you any secrets.
Remind me not to tell you any secrets.


So there's some nice equipment here then?
So there's some nice
equipment here then?
Uhh... I guess not.
Uhh... I guess not.


But she's a nun.
But she's a nun.
And you're a nun.
And you're a nun.

Too bad you don't have a day job to not quit.
Too bad you don't have a
day job to not quit.
I recommend you watch your mouth.
I recommend you watch your mouth.


Watch out, she's a snake!
Watch out, she's a snake!
Since when?
Since when?

Seriously, you make money off this?
Seriously, you make money off this?
I wish he could write better lyrics.
I wish he could write better lyrics.

You're on your own there, pal.
You're on your own there, pal.
Gosh, the world is so big!
Gosh, the world is so big!

And so, Alena's adventure begins as she and her companions hike eastward toward the village of Tempe. Check back soon for the next exciting installment of Retro Gamer Ryan: Dragon Warrior IV: Chapter 2 Edition!